Eyes may very well be the windows to the soul – but the same can be said about a child’s home-packed school lunch. These canvas totes, thermal boxes and even crumpled brown paper bags hold more than just a child’s middle meal – they carry a family’s secrets – revealed for all to see at the noon hour.
A little boy in my class always had whole bell peppers in his lunch which he ate like apples – I thought it was adorable. Another student brought in white rice and crackers every single day – and both his parents were doctors.
– Rebecca, mother and elementary school teacher
These packaged meals tell a story about the child they are meant for – where they come from and perhaps even where they are headed. Open a child’s lunch box and you may in fact be unearthing their socioeconomic environment, their ethnic background and the deep-rooted character traits of their caregivers. An open lunch box will put on display what families often strive to keep hidden – highly personal struggles involving time or finance; deeply private hopes and aspirations. An open lunch box will expose the plight of emotionally overwhelmed parents and stubborn and picky children.
I always peruse the kindergarten room at lunch time and one little boy in my class had this for his meal: a slice of candied egg bread with drizzled icing, a packaged Rice Krispie square, a ziplock of gummy worms, a bag of plain chips, a cupcake complete with icing and sprinkles and a container of Ritz crackers. Crazy – who would pack this for their kid? [Regarding her own children] My boys have gotten slightly pickier with their lunches nowadays but they routinely eat things like tofu chunks in coconut curry, cold roasted beets, steamed cold veggies like broccoli, brussels sprouts and baby corn, olives and slices of mango and avocado.
– Susan, mother of two and an elementary school teacher
Each food item placed inside is one puzzle piece within a larger narrative – chronicling a tale of love and care or hope and optimism even indifference and disregard. The idea of nourishment can actually play second fiddle to the diverse reactions this little box of food has the ability to elicit – a visceral backlash encompassing laughs, pity, scorn, bullying, anger and disgust.
Years ago, I had a student who would come to school with entire candy lunches. This went on for over a week until the school intervened and showed the parents a food guide. They were on the low end of the socioeconomic spectrum with little education and they were blown away by what a young child was expected to eat throughout the day. I have also had students that routinely come to school with nothing to eat. Part of my weekly grocery shop included buying extra food to keep on hand for them. An Educational Assistant would share his lunch with any needy students as well. As a result, a school lunch program was launched. Culturally speaking, I have noticed that many students of Middle Eastern, Indian and Pakistani background typically have outstanding lunches.
– Zacchaeus*, father and elementary school teacher
The contents of a child’s lunch box will offer up plenty of information about the child and their family life – whether they are vegetarian or vegan or gluten-free; whether they are fussy or open to variety; whether time is of the essence or there’s no great hurry; whether a child is independent or still heavily reliant on mom and dad; whether a family places emphasis on nutrition; whether parents have simply given up altogether.
I had a child in my class once bring a blender into school along with fruit, yogurt and milk in order to make their own personalized lunch smoothie. Another time, a kid brought in ice cream and was upset to discover it had melted! One student brought in an entire jar of maraschino cherries. Recently, one of my students brought in a bag of popped microwave popcorn and a can of pop – and nothing else.
– Danielle, mother of two and an elementary school teacher
An open lunch box is oftentimes an open invitation for judgement.
My daughter prefers WHOLE carrots and cucumbers (according to her, they have a different taste when cut)… Lunch supervisors might think I’m just lazy. – Claudia Ascuña, mother
What do my kids’ lunches say about me? Firstly, that I have yet to relinquish this particular control – the dreaded chore of lunch packing is still mine and mine alone. Secondly, that I’m a slave to routine – no need for a calendar as the days of the week are evident based on the lunches I put together: Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays are identical when it comes to packed lunches, Tuesdays are the wild card and Thursdays are school pizza days. Thirdly, I place more stress on balance than straight-up nutrition – staples include bread, lunch meat, crackers, sliced veggies and fruit; there are home made muffins and store bought granola bars included; topped off with a tiny container holding a secret treat – sometimes marshmallows, sometimes pretzels, sometimes home made cookies. And always water to drink – with a twist of lemon.
A few years back, I ran a healthy snack program at my kids’ school. You would be surprised what we could get kids to eat when the whole class was eating the same things together. The healthy snacks were a hit – even with the picky eaters! We put together veggies and hummus in cups, skewered green grape “snakes” with chocolate chip eyes, even monster shakes loaded with spinach, bananas and yogurt. But while there are so many parents out there who get excited over neat snack ideas, there are just as many who struggle with lunches. There was a child in Grade 4 who brought in a family-sized bag of chips and pop for lunch. There was a child in kindergarten who brought in for lunch: a donut, two wafer cookies, two Oreos, three other cookies and a lemonade – all neatly packed in a Bento lunch box!
– Danielle Carmichael Ferguson, mother
I’m not going to lie – I take my kids’ lunch failures personally. When food is returned and sandwiches left uneaten, I feel a tinge of failure. Plus those who know me well know that I hate food waste. After school, as I unpack the lunch bags and begin preparing for tomorrow – anything uneaten is either put back into the bag for the next day or provided as an after school snack to the child who ignored it the first time around. In case you were wondering, both of those particular tactics come straight out of Mommie Dearest.
A few years ago (my then 12-year-old son) Finn offered to make his own lunch. This was the result (at least he included a vegetable!). My go-to when groceries are slim is the ever popular “party mix”, which is basically the ends of random cereals with some mini marshmallows and/or chocolate chips thrown in.
– Cathy Logan, mother of three
Lunch time at school showcases a foreign universe to all who partake – as well as any other witnesses including school staff, volunteers, parents and students. One glimpse will remind us that there are seemingly endless possibilities when it comes to nourishing our children midday. Lunch may call to mind bologna sandwiches, flasks of soup, cereal with milk, waffles with syrup, sandwiches composed of Cheez Whiz and jelly or sugar and butter, sushi, pizza buns, entire sleeves of Oreos – even whole hotdogs with buns stuffed into thermoses.
There was a girl that my daughter Sam knew. Literally everyday this kid would get fast food for lunch, delivered to her by her dad – McDonald’s, Burger King, KFC, Pizza Hut, any fast food you can imagine. I mean every single day. I thought that was insane. At first Sam was jealous – when comparing her own lunch which was typically a wrap with fruit and yogurt and maybe some cookies. But she eventually realized that especially in the long run, maybe her lunch was the better option.
– Wendy Gutierrez-Allan, mother of two
There’s no real standard or by-the-book when it comes to school lunches. The concept is fluid and ever-changing. There’s good and not-so-good and infinite examples of in-between.
Many of the lunches I see in my classroom are sad because of the community I teach in – and the fact that some parents just don’t have the money or education to properly feed their kids. Many children show up with lunches comprised of Koolaid Jammers, cookies and Twinkies. One kid came with four pieces of pizza for lunch one day – and then nothing at all the next. Some parents literally have no idea what to send in with their children as a suitable lunch. Sometimes kids will come to school with cake for lunch – not even in a container – just loose in a lunch bag.
– Kate*, mother of two and an elementary school teacher
Reminiscing about our home-packed lunches can be an activity rife with nostalgia. I remember my Holly Hobbie lunch pail with matching thermos. The thermos top doubled as a cup which I would carefully pour my lukewarm milk into and I can still remember that slightly sour taste.
When I was a kid, I loved sardines (and still do). My mom used to send me to school with sardine sandwiches and big dill pickles. It stunk so bad! When I was about ten, I realized I needed to save my sardine intake for when I got home from school.
– Nathan Vickers, father of two
My mom used to make us cold meat loaf sandwiches with ketchup. And this wasn’t the tender, tasty gourmet meatloaf either – it was rock hard.
– Sandra Cook, mother of two
When I was little, I used to take ketchup sandwiches to school for lunch. I loved them. Just two slices of bread with ketchup as filling.
– Michele Sullivan, mother
My cousin used to bring cow tongue sandwiches to school for lunch. No joke – she was a farm girl.
– Brady Schmidt, mother of one
These lunch bags and boxes may be chock full of nutritious snacks and empty calories, sugar and caffeine, proteins and carbs, vitamins and minerals, healthy fats and not-so-healthy fats. But if you believe that school lunches are stocked with foodstuff and nothing more . . . then I’ll tell you to take another look.
I cringed when I read about the two doctors sending their child to school with a lunch of white rice and crackers. It brought back memories of our next door neighbour, also a doctor, an anesthesiologist, who fed her two young children nothing but Kentucky Fried Chicken and white rice. Her children were sent home from school because they kept passing out due to malnutrition. I witnessed this doctor’s bedside manner with several young children at the hospital before they were to have their tonsils removed. It was deplorable. I subsequently told our family doctor that this doctor was forbidden to administer medical care to any member of my family. Through his forced smile, he recorded my wishes into our medical records. I never did find out what she ate for lunch. But her dog died choking to death on a chicken bone.